This might sound funny, especially coming from another guy but spend some time looking at yourself in the mirror. Those of you who have had girlfriends in the past know that Girls spend hours upon hours fussing over every little detail before they go out. Why? Because first impressions count and anytime you’re in public, especially in a super social setting like a club or bar you want to put your best self forward. That said, we’re not advocating spending half the evening getting ready but do spend some time doing a quick rundown of basic things you should have covered.

• Hair – There’s a big difference between bed hair and the tussled I don’t care look. Know the difference.
• Facial Hair  – Have a look in mind – if you’re going for that clean look, make sure you’re clean shaven completely, if you’re looking for that stubble  look, make sure it fits, if you’re going for that I don’t care slacker look, at least make sure it’s a clean looking sloppy. Lazy never looks good. Figure out what your look is and make sure
• Skin – Address any glaring issues
• Clothes – No obvious wrinkles or embarrassing stains
• Breath– If you need me to tell you your teeth should be clean and breathe fresh then here we go

That’s it! It shouldn’t take more 2 minutes to do all that. It’s crazy how many guys don’t do a basic check before going out. The goal of the mirror look isn’t to have you looking like a GQ model or some Hollywood actor. It’s to reinforce the fact to yourself that you’re putting your best self forward. Just the fact that you’ve done the basic check will help you feel confident in whom you are and things you do and how you act.

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When women go out with their friends, they tend to create this illusion that their out to protect one another interest which means doing everything they can to cock-block on a guy that tries to dance with their friends. Some of the reasons why they choose to cock-block could be because for one, they are insecure of themselves, or use the classic line that “my friend has a boyfriend, therefore, you should back up and allow them to dance amongst themselves even though they are in a environment where there are several single people trying to dance. Usually this is enough for a guy to want to back away, and maybe reevaluate his options for the night. However, with the advice I offer you in this blog, you should be able to utilize the friends of females to get to the woman you want.

Women tend to feel comfortable when a confident guy penetrate their circle. If you approach a group of girls with your target set on a female, and you come of as somewhat timid, it would enable the group to seal you off because “they came to dance amongst themselves”. Once you have your sites on the lady, I would open up a small conversation with the least attractive girl in the group, and would make her feel as special as possible to earn some cheap brownie points within the group. After establishing yourself within the circle of friends, I’ll dance with the girl I initially opened with, and dance 1 song with her.
After the song is over, I’ll walk to the bar to grab a drink, which will give the ladies a short time to talk about how “cute he is” before coming back a bit more relaxed, and target the woman you initially had your eye on, and bring on that A game. Strong word of advice, as we stressed time and time again, use humor to loosen her up so she’ll loosen you up where it counts.
Good Luck!

-Hajji

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Yes and no. Here’s why, first the ‘bad news’. Yes, definitely helps to know how to dance. According to many women there is a perception that the way a guy dances is an extension of the way a guy is in bed. That said whether that perception is true or not does not matter when it comes down to it.

The good news is that the most important thing when you’re dancing at a nightclub is not sex directly. Nope, its whether or not you’re being perceived as someone who is fun to be around. The most attractive guy in a club is the guy who is just out there having a good time, with a positive attitude. You’ll notice that when you dance to music that you know and enjoy people, girls in particular notice that and appreciate your confidence and comfort in the situation.

Bottom-line, I’ll say that knowing how to dance or at least, staying on rhythm is important, but if you have a time dancing to the latest moves I will say, at least having positive outlook and attitude is a huge difference maker and will separate yourself from the other guys in the club that fight huge dancing demons.

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To sum it up in one word, humor. I’m a huge fan of opening up the conversation with humor while dancing because bringing humor into the situation is a complete, total icebreaker to awkwardness you might have between yourself and your target. When you’re just dancing things can get awkward because a lot of times if you dance with somebody and you really don’t have much to talk about it can be kind of awkward for a second, you know, like “OK, where do we go now?” like “what’s next?”.

However if you’re kind of funny and you say a few jokes then your target will soften up, put her shield down and enjoy your company and more importantly enjoy you as an individual. The best part about that is that you don’t have to be the funniest guy in the world, you can use a lot of humor that deals with environment that you’re in. For instance you can point to someone and say something like, “Hey, look at that guy, he really know how to move right?” pointing at someone dancing kind of awkwardly or you can slightly neg your target by saying someting like “yeah girl, you got more moves than what I expected, you can teach me a thing or two” because everyone is self conscious about how they dance.

Using humor can soften up the situation to a state where you can start talking to her and engaging her with more standard game. Using humor while dancing makes it a lot easier to esclate a verbal conversation after you move her off the dance floor.

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The Silent Opener

So now that you have preserved as much social value as you can by not breaking any of the cardinal rules of dance floor game what’s next? The opener. The Silent Opener would probably be more accurately described as the the nonverbal opener because it relies exclusively on nonverbal cues to communicate dominance and assertiveness.

There are two forms of silent openers that my colleagues and I perform on the dance floor; ‘the bait and reel’ and ‘the pound.’

Bait and reel
The bait and reel is the simplest form of dance floor opener, in fact, it is the method you are most likely to see so-call natural performing in a club. You’ve seen it before, a totally random guy walking right up to a girl and initiating a dance without saying a single word. What seems like magic is no more than several intentional actions that project dominance and assertiveness to a players target.

• The Bait
  Described before the bait involves inciting eye contact with a target in a way which seems serendipitous. Glance slight to the left or the right of your target to try to catch a glance, once she’s bitten the bait, turn your head to her and acknowledge her glance.

• The Approach
  Smile warmly, lock eye contact and approach with purpose. Try to walk in the straightest line possible towards her. Do not smile like a creep or a kid being tickled, but instead give the impression that you’re mildly amused by her being entranced by you. The amazing thing about this is that as long as eye contact is locked before you start moving, you’ll be able to approach from any distance. Optimum is about 10 to 15 feet, but I’ve walked longer distances without eye contact being loss.

• The Initiation
  On your approach take mental note of where her hands are. Once you’re one to one and a half feet away from her, take her hand lift it up and spin her around. The entire process is so alpha she’ll be thinking more about how not to mess it up than about who you are and why she shouldn’t dance with you.

Pound and Spin
Although this move is a bit gimmicky it can be used in situations where you do not have enough social proof to do a standard approach or with very good looking girls or sets that otherwise would blow out a direct approach. In situations where my social proof has been reset or not as high as I would like for whatever reason, I use the Pound and Spin to reestablish myself. This method is especially good at breaking open dance circles of girls.

• The Approach
  Walk up to the set with high energy and confidence and move directly to your target. Lean over and ‘confide’ in a person who is not your target to ‘watch this’

• The Initiation
  Stick your fist out like you are about to give some props and make eye contact with your target. Wait expectantly for her to put two and two together. She’ll usually slowly perform the prop action without any additional goading or prompting on your part. After the prop action is taken, maintain eye contact as you hold her hand and elevate it to the ceiling. After both of your hands are above her head, spin her around and commence dancing. Like the direct approach above, the entire motion should be smooth, and when performed properly comes off as super alpha.

These two initiation openers are guaranteed to open any set 90-97 percent of the time if performed correctly. One thing I’d add is that when you are doing either you need to divorce your self from the result and simply be in the moment. Even if you got shot down moments ago clear all that from you mind and think about presenting positive energy. Personally, the only times these openers work is when I have self doubt or apprehensions about opening. When I separate myself from the end result and focus on putting a positive confident approach out there positive results follow.

Next Post- Dance Game – Part 3 – Escalation

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One of the areas that the pick up community tends to avoid like the plague is dance floor opening and attraction techniques. Most people avoid this aspect of the game because they feel like you need to be some super talented dancer to pull anything from the dance floor. In actuality this is far from the truth, and with a little bit of practice you can conquer what has been called by some, the El dorado of pickup.

Dance Floor Rules of Thumb
There are three basic principles you need to internalize when you’re on the dance floor

• Never stand by yourself on a dance floor
• Make eye contact then open
• Never linger without acting

Lets go over each of these points to foster an understanding of each.

Never stand by yourself on a dance floor – Social proof is critical in dance floor game. The ultimate destoyer of social proof is standing alone on the dance floor looking on or scanning the scene. This doesn’t make you look cool, it mkes you look creepy. It doesn’t matter if you have a drink in your hand you still look creepy. If you came with friends, stand by them and feign a conversation if you’re on the dance floor. If you’re by yourself go to the bar area and run regular attraction material to win over and move a set from the bar to the dance floor. Both of these actions will give you a launch pad and home base to come back to as you launch your dance openers throughout the night.

Making eye contact – This rule is less absolute for younger ages (18 – 20) but is an absolute must for older ages (21+). It’s kind of difficult to explain the right way to do this without pictures or diagrams but you want to try to incite a glance without staring. People naturally glance at objects or things that they perceive are looking at them. Try looking slightly to the left of someones temple (bait) when you’re walking by them at the mall or supermarket. They’ll look at you first to see if you’re looking at them (bit) but realize that you’re not, but in that moment you turn your head right at them and catch them looking at you (caught) and meet them with a genuine smile. Not only will they feel a tad bit guilty for staring, but your smile will disarm them enough to start a conversation. On the dance floor this technique is essential to making the approach feel both natural and spontaneous. You want to position yourself and your group ~ 45- 75 degrees from the straight field of vision of your prospect (i’ll probably draw a diagram for this). It’ll take a while to master but making and locking eye contact with prospects immediately before approaching broadcasts that you’re an alpha who isn’t afraid of taking what he wants after he’s seen it.

Never linger- Many of you are familiar with the three second rule in bar and daytime game. On the dance floor you have 1 to 2 seconds to act after establishing eye contact or else you need to reset (both in positioning, timing, and target). By giving you and your target such a limited time window you decrease the chances of both you and target making excuses on why you shouldn’t dance. Net net, the more you fight those internal demons the greater chance of rejection

Next post- Dance Floor Game – Part 2 – The Silent Opener

~Profit

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Lets be clear. When you have a prospect on deck there has to be a good connection between the two in order for you to hit it on the first date. What works for me is when I take a girl out to a full date (dinner, bowling, etc,) I demonstrate a lot of value by making her laugh, making her feel comfortable , and listening to the various stupid shit that woman like to talk about. After were done hanging out, I ask them if they would be intrested in watching a movie or something at my house. Once their at my place, this is the steps I take in making magic happen.

1. Making sure the room is nice and clean. Before i even leave my house going on a date, I make sure my place is clean because i know its a great chance i’ll be asking them to come.

2. Being patient. Dont be so thirsty because you got some pussy in your room. Relax a bit. laugh with her and share a couple of jokes. After shes feeling loose and comfortable, take her to a place where theres privacy such as a room or something.

3. The Movie- From there, proceed to putting on a movie preferbily something that would grab her attention. IE no American Pie. Put on something with a little bit of action maybe some with some sex.

4. Move 1. Den the lights. Once the lights is denned, make sure you move close to her so theres some friction happening.

5. Move 2. Put your arm around her slowly. From this point on, if shes really comfortable with you, she’ll embrace it. Once she embraces that arm, its on.

6. Move 3. Go for the kiss. Once the kiss is estblished, and if your good, her body will be hot as hell and the temperture will be rising.

7. Move 4. Lastly, kiss on the neck and offer to go for a massage and from that point on, you should know what to do.

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For one reason or another, a lot of woman try to use the phrase “I have a boyfriend” to get you to stop talking to them. Based on trial and error, I discovered the best way to combat this is to simply not mention her relationship stuatus during the course of a conversation, and simplying rebuttling her if she comes off rude by saying ” I have a boyfriend before you even get a chance to run your routine. You will suprised to find out over a course of a laugh or two that shes simply trying to filter out the trash that comes her way by using the boyfriend defense. Most men buying into that crap and simply give up. Personally if its not my friends or family girl friend, I’m going for the throat.

If your going rapid fire aka playing the number game, here is some important rebuttles just in case they use the boyfriend defense before you get a chance to run your routine.

1. Who mentioned something about a boyfriend? I’m just out trying to have a good time.

2. I didn’t ask you about your problem, however, if you need a shoulder to lean on, i’ll be more then happy to provide my side to you.

3. Do you really? thats great because I have a girlfriend. I was just approching you because you look like someone I went to school with.

4. Boyfriend huh? thats good because he stole you away from a championship team ( and you look at her like you hinting about yourself.)

-Hajji

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